Shaolin Master

Now thats something you dont see everyday.

G420, I am your new celgrp guitarist..lol.

"Twinkeler twinkeler litterler starr, aye am deh Shaolin Bangala who will kick your butt far far.."

I get revelation when im bored HAHA.

A few weeks back, as i was on e train going home after fellowship after svc, i was talking with thomas and timo abt e things of God. and i remembered thomas mentioned something about the 7 parts of the human body tt corresponded to the number 7 which is God's number or the perfect/complete number..

but i was so in love with God i decided to check out my Creator haha. lol..sorry God for being naughty and checking You out, but i just cant sleep with puzzles in my head and i still have mysteries about You and me i wanna check out haha..:PP

I wanna know just how unique i am to God and how much He loves me haha. call me cheeky boy but i just love my God so..haha..yup.

while i was sitting at my comp in a state of stress and boredom, i decided to do some study.

There are 7 regions in the human body:

head+neck
upper limb
thorax
abdomen
back
pelvis and perineum
lower limb

There are 12 major organs in the human body:

ears
muscles
liver
brain
bladder
heart
eyes
lungs
kidneys
stomach
skeleton
skin

7 is the number of God, the perfect number, completeness.
12 is the number of government.

We are created in the image of God (7) to fulfill the cultural mandate (12)! =))

Praise God! haha. such revelation in the midst of boredom m_m i must be really mad to be able to have such encounters lol. i found one more thing.

In human beings, male and female,

there are a total of 24 inner organs:

Adrenals, Appendix, Bladder, Brain, Eyes, Gall Bladder, Heart, Intestines, Kidney, Liver, Lungs, Esophagus, Ovaries, Pancreas, Parathyroids, Pituitary, Prostate, Spleen, Stomach, Testicles, Thymus, Thyroid, Veins, Womb.

and 24 means: Priestly courses; governmental perfection

okay, im kinda stuck here..anyone wanna enlighten me on what does that mean? haha!

Celgrp, Svc

cg was great. it was a mini PM. my fingers were tired and aching, but i was happy :) during fellowship i sat at e table smelling and hearing Sebas gave his testimony on how delicious the beef kway tiao was..haha. and the tangible presence of beef overwhelmed my nostrils LOL.

half of us ate, half of us were waiting to break fast. me included of course haha. its really in fasting that u really learn to lean on God and to use your spirit to rule your flesh and make it your slave.

service was great today. many ppl were set free. though there wasnt any area i needed to be prayed for, i wasnt satisfied. i wanted deep down to experience God the way those who were prayed for, did. Then God encouraged me, He said though i couldnt be down there, i am still important cus i helped to make it possible for those down at the floor to experience God so intimately..i helped to build the atmosphere.

and i was so encouraged. i told God that i didnt want to go home today not having received anything, but God's ways are always higher than mine. and if He's happy, im happy. :D

ate at burgerking after that. basically, from the moment we started eating burgerking till we got home, we were laughing and feeling high all the way. We need deliverance from burgerking LOL. Man, u have pohchoo and jianhao, they will make ur experience tiring, because youll die laughing and running out of air haha..

ive been loving the weather for e past few days. =) btw, ive received news about my IHP. i must submit the TOR (Terms of Reference and other documents by october, OMG stress!). btw, met a new friend today, haha. He's jo's friend, Rowan (did i spell correctly? haha). he plays GE also, level quite high..damn! haha..

btw, just some random thoughts, when a friend whom uve known for a long time becomes an anointed man/woman, most of the time, e way i view and treat that person would be totally different. mebbe most of e time im not as 'playful' anymore and i find myself a bit more serious when im around the person..

i dunno if this is random or lame or w/e u wanna call it..

jus wondering if anyone out there feels e same towards me, e moment i became cg guitarist :O i dunno, word of knowledge? haha. for some reason i jus feel this makes sense somehow to some people.

anyway, my cg is very self-entertaining LOL. we are comically unglam lol. and that Derrick, man, i would recommend him for drama! i totally got fooled by his acting :O haha. Speaking of unglam, poor pamela and her ribbon and jacket..haha and that pohchoo..she's literally driving me nuts even though she doesnt have a driving license and yes girl, i know ure reading haha!

i think ive just been dethroned LOL. haha when you have a 'lame' anointing from adam unto the whole cg..we can start a new course in church known as GIC...LOL! run by Tricia, as recommended by our outing IC haha.

im looking forward to our Spiderpig outing haha.

We should change our celgrp name from E420 to G420. :P

Morning encounter

This morning I had another encounter. oh one more thing about yesterday..I told God..(When the tutor called us to come back on monday after 3-4minutes)

"Whoa..like that also can! lol. God, You are IMPOSSIBLE man..haha"

yea i was a BIT happy..at least i wasnt that tense anymore haha.

ok, back to my encounter this morning..

I woke up, i dunno why, mebbe its cus i had to pract for cg later, so i thought, hmm..why not do a dry run now without the chords..cus i havent printed em yet..

and so i picked up my guitar..the song But God has copyright and G4C doesnt allow e chords to be displayed so i just played by feeling and hearing and i managed to tab e song out. and so..i played But God..it was great.

and when i tried playing For This Cause..well, i was playing without chords and some notes went off key..as soon as i started singing in e spirit, something incredible happened. i was singing as usual, melodies just came out..new songs came out..

btw, its been a long time since i did any of my own songs haha. and so, i was just singing this chorus "I love you, my Jesus. Forever, my Lord and Friend" and the Holy Spirit just entered my room. i remembered what ps said about the secret place.

its a moment on intimacy, in a room, no phone, no computer, no distraction. when ure truly alone, when u truly love God, when you truly seek God, alone in a room, God WILL show up.

and i started singing slower..i started praying in e spirit, singing in understanding, praying in understanding..i was just overwhelmed by e presence of God. it felt as if i was in that cg meeting last sunday. those who went know what it felt like..

and i started tearing..as i was tearing i talked to God..it was a moment of intimacy. and i soon found myself just wailing like a baby before God. in just 45 minutes, not only i experienced intimacy between 'husband and wife', i experienced 2 levels of intimacy. the other being the intimacy between 'Father and son'.

it was a 'multiple' haha if i can put it tt way. some girls will know what 'multiple-ahem' means when u talk about intimacy haha. i shall not mention it here cus i have people under 18 who read my blog so its ok :)) anyway, thats my life for you. exciting and never boring. indeed that 45 minutes was a great start for my day, and we should start everyday not just with e presence of God, but with an encounter.

i remembered what Dr AR Bernard said about the levels of relationship. You start of as an acquaintance when you first meet God. Slowly you become friends. which is good. But the highest level of relationship is intimacy. Dr AR Bernard once said, you CANNOT experience intimacy if you cant fulfill the lower levels of relationship. Acquaintance, friendship, companionship, etc. (I need to refer to my notes).

Intimacy is the highest level. a friendship is good. when you reach the level where ure totally committed thats even better. how much of your life have you surrendered to Him? its not about getting emotional, its about touching God!

one word from God and your life will never be the same.
one encounter from God and your life has been changed.
thats the difference.

really..all it takes to touch God like that is just the right attitude. if you have a guitar, just take it and play, even if you dont know. just learn 4 chords to play. melodies can just come. and when i pray or sing in e spirit, i use 4 chords if not 3, and on some rare occasions, 5 chords. with 4 chords u can play almost any song.

u might think, nah, im not wired to play e guitar. but im sure ure wired to worship right? so just give it a shot. if it doesnt seem to work, never mind, at least play some soft worship song in e background to build up the atmosphere.

part of learning to be intimate with God is learning to create your own atmosphere. just like a honeymoon, you have to make preparations, make sure e ambience is good, etc. its just like that. ps once said, how you treat people is a reflection of how you treat God. if your relationship with God isnt working out, your relationship with people will not work out.

if you cant be intimate with God, how to be intimate with people? if you cant create at atmosphere of love in your own room by yourself, how to be loving to others? similarly if your life with God is dry and boring, let me tell you, your life with people will be dry and boring.

thats how it is. its all about relationship. its all about attitude. its all about the way you think.

Project Demo, Encounter

God pulled the strings on me again. Haha. Okay, it was more of an encounter. yup, another one :D haha..Back to me story, Today, I was a bit tense entering the room to present on a half-complete project :S

Things went wrong, everything that could go wrong, went wrong lol. Me and my friend didnt bring our laptops cus the file was uploaded onto e sch server and we assumed that we would present on the tutor's laptop directly, which was always e case.

First problem, the school network suddenly went down. So e tutor cant access e network folder and open our project file.

Then he asked: Did you bring your laptop?
Err..no. What about your friend? Err..no..lol.
Well done..first was network crash, now no laptop to present.

So we sat there, the tutor sat there. Everyone stoned. Okay, e tutor was trying many attempts to see if the network was restored. Finally after 5min, it was back to normal.

Opened the project file, and started presenting. Halfway through, eh..how come the shopping cart not working? Oh no! Its not the updated one! And so, our 'demo' ended in less than 5minutes.

When i did the project report, i had screenshots of the working shopping cart from e updated file. So he called us to come back on monday with our laptops and finish up the presentation of the rest of the website. haha..

and why did i say God played a prank? Cus i have a few more days to add extra features into my project! wahaha! hope i still pass though :S

what e devil meant for bad, God turned it for good..all things work out for those who love Him..oh yeah! lol. hai, even though e time may not be much, a few extra marks is gd enough =/

For the last one week, there were 2 days where during the night, just before i slept, my head would start spinning and i would feel like im going in circles. thats how stressed i am right now..and its starting to affect my health. i hope i dun faint/collapse one day in school or something..

the last place i wanna end up is in the hospital. people think: nah, stress is good. or..stress is no big deal, who doesnt have stress?

let me tell you in your stinking face that not everyone is made like you! You dont sweat under stress! You dont become red under stress! You dont have spinning head or feel giddy under stress! You dont bang into people/objects/walls under stress! And you dont lose your memory and focus under stress! So just shut your mouth and enjoy your stress!

Dont look down on me just because im more 'weak'/'vulnerable'. You like to look down so much? Good for you! Hope you dont see the wall in front of you and bang your stupid head into it!

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

I bang walls because im stressed and cant focus.
You bang walls because you're a clumsy humpty dumpty fool!

Cg tmr, i really hope God shows up tangibly again. Cg will be fasting tmr, today i mean, for mike connell's svc on sat. More encounters! =)

The Curse of Programming

Never take IT. Never study programming. Never do anything related to computers. Technology can, anything but computers.

IT/Programming is a curse. It makes you throw away what uve learned every 2-3 years and it forces you to re-learn or learn something new. And it never ends, so you wanna talk about future in IT? Forget it. There's no future in IT, only progress.

Yes..IT is a progression without a future. Ive regretted taking this stupid module the moment i entered year 1. And i cant seem to escape it.

Taking final year TWICE is as good as 2 years without break. because they DONT give you breaks after your final exam! In Ngee Ann that is.

Im sick and tired of looking at codes for FOUR FRIGGING years. It has deprived me of reality, deprived me of language, sciences and mathematics. It even deprived me of basic economics and arts. Speaking of arts, there's no aesthetic in programming. Only routines! Thats what makes it sucky!

Thats why im lame and crappy. just like programming languages. They dont make sense. They're just words. Im not made a robot, but we are trained to be robots. Programming takes away your life, your future, and it doesnt satisfy the aesthetic need of your human soul, starving it to death.

Thats why im a boring person. Because programming is boring! Id rather wash the toilet than to do stupid programming! Just try eating rice and soya sauce for FOUR LONG YEARS, everyday, every meal! I tell you, ull end up in an asylum faster than my butt can fart!

*Puuuut. oops i just farted. are u in an asylum yet? no? too bad. one day ull find ur way there. and for those who tend to lose your way, im sure GPS systems will help you find your way to woodbridge or hougang chalet. have a safe trip!

i feel like im getting older. there's white hair and whats next? wrinkles? speaking of wrinkles, what do you call a programmer with wrinkles? Pringles! OH YEAH! Im so good, ure so noob.

oh, one more thing..Programming speeds up your ageing process. so be sure to take your daily supplements of vitamins and minerals especially in a room with a computer. your nose hair might end up so long you could flip it over your head!

whats worse..you might end up combing Armani style on your armpits or do a mohawk on your 'southpole'. Guys and girls inclusive. well, thats the only aesthetic part about programming. but the strange thing is..the only hair on your body that doesnt grow longer is your head! why? because it wouldve all fallen off by then..

Well, the fallen hair is probably for guys only. As for girls who do programming, your hair might end up standing at every debugging error you get, so much that if i were to flip you over, i could use your hair as a brush and paint the Eiffel Tower!

For those who struggle with your fleshly nature, well, ive got the cure for temptations. Thats right, enter the world of programming. Its an effective temptation countermeasure because not only does it resist temptation, it totally DESTROYS the need! As a fellow programmer, i can say that because ive experienced first hand..the power of programming!

Not only is programming good as a temptation countermeasure, its good for your daily dietary schedule as well. Ladies and gentlemen, introducing the all new ANTI-FATS program thats more effective than eating grass..

I give you..PROGRAMMING! Yes. Ever wanted to have that slim figure? or that masculine shape? than i got good news for you. PROGRAMMING IS THE WAY, THE TRUTH, and THE LIFE!

Having trouble resisting tempting food? Then programming is here to kill your appetite as fast as a speeding bullet! Hmm actually..

a bullet CANT speed. =/ cus of terminal velocity, okay, this is not physics, its programming.

okay, i think im going a bit too far random in this post. i dun really care seriously. who gives a damn about programming? OH WAIT, can a 'damn' be given in the first place? Is it a noun or a verb? Or a verbal noun, or a nouning verb? Hmm..

I guess u probably regretted reading this post. Im trying my best not to age too fast with all my frustrations and anger. Id like to cultivate the new habit of creative anger. Yes..only the Great One, Yours Truly, can develop this lvl100 skill.

Creative Anger is a skill that only the Programmer class can learn. and you need a lvl10 Laming Skill and a lvl1 Programming skill to learn this new skill. You can purchase the skillbook from any IT/electronics firm.

okay, im trying really hard to end this post. but the more i think of programming, the more i wanna type because i DONT WANT to program anymore!

oh yes, one last thing..i promise this will be the last ull hear me in this post. Ever heard the term: Programming sucks? Now..actually its not really a term, its a fact.

And because programming sucks, programming kills. Why? Here's why. When a programmer is in front of his comp, programming..

Programming sucks - which means the monitor screen will begin to suck his head towards the screen.

Programming kills - Programming will suck so much that the programmer's head gets smashed into the screen, killing the programmer with deep cuts, bruises and electrocution.

Not bad huh? O_O

IHP, Stress

Went for the IHP briefing today. History is repeating itself. After my exams, there will be NO break. So its gonna be another 400 days without break. IHP will start in october and end in late feb 2008. Why 400 days? Cus its one whole year without break. And a bit more cus its one semester PLUS 20 weeks.

On the bus, i was feeling warm, on the train, i was sweating cold sweat. Ever had something you wanted so bad but you just cant seem to be able to get it? It was so stressful that it became anger inside. I was burning up.

I was sweating, my face and ears were reddish. Not because im shy, its because IM FRIGGING STRESSED UP SHITTY ANGRY! Not only i cant think straight under extreme stress, not only i do stupid things under extreme stress, but i can sweat and appear red under stress!

Why? Because all the stress and frustration is inside. And it never goes out. Not once in 10 years, ive let my stress out. Ive always kept it inside. I know its risky for my mental and emotional health, i know its risky and dangerous because i can go off anytime, but what can I do? There's nothing I can do.

God, Ive been fighting for very long...God, if You're not gonna help me, then its best I dont even try at all! I am nothing without You, you hear me? Until You say yes, until You give me Your presence and power, I dont care if I fail, I just WONT EVEN TRY!

I cant take it anymore. IHP AGAIN! 20 weeks of hell, doing hell in hell! "Just do your best" OH YAR, JUST DO MY BEST. Let me tell you something, not only have i dont my best, Ive given my all! Like I said, you want an ideal friend, get lost. You want a perfect Andrew? Go home and suck it. You will never find an ideal friend. Stop dreaming and wake up!

I dont care if you're a dog or a monkey, Im a human for goodness sake! And WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH MSN? I keep on DCing the WHOLE DAY!

By the way, Blogger.com's management sucks. I think i can do a better job. You know what is 'Remember me'? Everytime i login i click remember me. YOU FRIGGING FAILED YOUR ENGLAND ISIT? Its REMEMBER ME, not REMIND ME! Urrgh, Im so disgusted! And where the heck did they hide the feedback form huh? O_O Leave a bug there and hide the feedback form, well done.

One more thing, who borrowed my Cross Album???

Demo for my assignment is tmr. Presenting a half-completed work. STOP PLAYING GAMES WITH ME!

Yui

http://www.yui-net.com/

JPop singer who sang one of my favourite Bleach anime theme songs.

She's same age as me :O

Captivated :$ haha!

okay, i shall stop here..lol.

I cant stand studying IT/Programming anymore.

Random - memories

okay, this is gonna be short, i hope..haha.

Choochoo reminded me of something funny that happened yesterday which i missed out. Thad's scream..haha. it was so funny, we were crossing e road on holland-v when this car turned in..and he let out a feminine scream.

lol..in my early sec sch days i used to scream a lot, even in pri5 and pri6 haha. for those who know me since pri5, im sure u remember who is chan beng foong, my 'close' friend..haha. he was a screamer back then, i guess i learned from him..haha..funny moments of my childhood..

and ull hear me screaming the most when im lan gaming in a lanshop..haha. all those CS/DOD moments with a bunch of friends at a lanshop were my precious childhood memories haha.

but also, in a way, my childhood is a bit deprived haha..cus im the quiet guy who sits in a corner, blending into e wallpaper. i mean, i do have my own 'click', but back then in pri sch, im a loner. i was ugly and round and looked like a dork. lol.

no one really paid attention to me..haha. jus ask pam, thad, rhonda. i dun tink i even talked to thad in pri sch lol. sihui was also my classmate, but only in pri6.

its amazing now to think of it, how God was at work right when we were young. id never thought id be playing for cg, id never thought that people like pam, thad and rhonda would one day be my cg members. of course, now rhonda's in wayne's cg and she's rising up very fast, im happy for her.

ever wondered how it would be like, if one day your primary school classmate whom u grew up with became a leader? haha. its pretty interesting, come to think of it. God is just so good.

whenever I think of God, im just at a loss for words. For God to use a 'geek-ball' to play e guitar is IMPOSSIBLE haha. i prob looked worse than ps kong when he was young, haha. i was so round that if u were to put me on the chair, i would roll out of the room lol!

i remembered in primary 5, i had this pretty teacher Miss Eva Lim. haha! it was soooo funny. one day during class she came to me, 'eh, u look not bad, ur voice must be quite loud one..' and i remembered that look of shockness on my face..'what are u talking abt?'

haha and i duno abt u, but i remembered i became the class 'loudspeaker' O_O. 'andrew, help me switch on the OHP, andrew help me arrange the table, andrew..here and there, this and that..i like you, ure so obedient..'

well, its not just her, but i carried books and bags for almost every teacher in primary school! even those who didnt teach me..haa. i would walk from e canteen to the 'fish pond' and a teacher would walk by me and asked me if i could help him/her carry stuff.

come to think of it now, Miss Lim was teasing me la..lol! when the class was making noise, she would look at me and i knew what i had to do. well, basically i had to shout 'shut up'. SO UNGLAM RIGHT? ^.O i will never forget that look..on her face..and the loud scream that went into the air whenever e class was noisy..hahaha.

and tats my childhood for you. unglam and servanthood. and i never got angry, i never complained. i was a very quiet person who only talked when im talked to. my mum was a GB captain back then in Fairfield Girls' School..thats how she got to know MANY of my pri sch teachers and principal. almost every teacher whom i knew, knew my mum.

all those things i remembered from my childhood:

Going to school with clarence every morning cus we stayed near each other.
Chan Beng Foong following me everywhere I go. :p
Clarence talking about Rhonda's nose..OOPS :x
Pamela banging my table and being the fierce big sis. (*shivers)

Mdm Ang (Hong lao shi) and the 'red bomb' haha.
Ong Tzu Jie my ah beng, joker friend. (a quiet geekball friends with an ahbeng, wow? LOL)
My TAF-Club days..(boink boink boink)
Miss Low Soh Tin, Rocky Lau, Miss Eva Lim/Daphne Lim.

Scary Mr Azman lol, Joker Mr Matthew Lim (oh! i saw him in my campus canteen eating with 4 sec sch students..when i saw him, i saw God. it was like fellowship and he bought them drinks, etc. ill share with those who know Mr Lim haha, just ask me anytime. it was great.)

Some embarrassing moments..haha..i shall not list down. (ask me at your own risk haha! if ure my cg member im more likely to share haha)

damn, this post is very long..haha! oops sorry LOL.

oh ya, today after my class ended at 12, i had my usual 4hr break until my next lesson 4-6. ONLY realise that today's 4pm lesson was cancelled! Ahhhh!!!!! i wasted 4hrs stoning in school!!! T_T. now u see..stress makes me forgetful and unoptimal. i can cope with it, i just cant seem to do well/best under it..

oh wells..tts all for today haha..

School, encounter

assignment submitted. and its rather half done T_T.

i dunno what is gonna happen next. another assignment to submit by this week, same module! and another 2 more by next week. and one test this week, one test next week. no break? :x

this morning i killed a snail lol. i was so stressed, i was praying and talking to God as i was walking to the MRT station. along e way, i didnt noticed anything and i stepped on a snail 'creeeaaakk' and i crushed it lol..and the ooze..O_O and my shoe..

OMG haha. thank God no smell. =/

jus now during my lunch break..i had another encounter. man, i have encounters everyday! thats how our lives should be. as i as queueing and ordering my food, i was just talking to God. "Hey let's have lunch together k? Im so alone..at least I have You, im more than happy..", and i went on..

soon, the presence of God overwhelmed me..and my eyes became wet. i almost teared, in a crowded canteen, in a place full of business, noise and activity. i had an intimate moment with the most high God, while queueing up for my food.

what more can i ask for? im just so overwhelmed and amazed. im speechless, thank You for being so near to me God. You're all I want, You're all I need. =)

Draw me near to Your throne!

I wanna stay!

I wanna stay here..with You..

Encounter, Ministry, Service, Celgrp, Fellowship, Assignment

oookay, this is prob e longest title..AND..it might be e longest entry! haha.

ENCOUNTER

i shall start with what happened to me on e train yesterday (sat) while goin for svc. basically i was on e train and at JE stn, there was this old lady. she stood afar off from where i was seated. naturally 2 things would come into my mind:

1. the people standing near her shld let her seat.
2. if i were to stand up, walk to her and give up my seat, 2 things can happen:

a. Itll be so paiseh cus e train was rather crowded.
b. what if i stand up and someone else sit on my seat instead?

then i sat there with the earphones in my ear cus i was listening to planetshakers. then God whispered: andrew, let her sit.

then i thought: aiya, dun wan la..she so far away, God, a bit paiseh..

then God spoke louder this time: Just let her sit..

"so embarrassing..not that i dun wanna let her sit, its just that..u know?"

and before i could tell God any further..He shut my CDplayer! hahaha! OMG! it was full battery, it just went off. immediately i knew, okay, cannot play play anymore..ok ok, u win, u win..

and i stood up..haha..and i was so happy after that i smiled to myself..lol. not only was e lady happy, i kinda felt God saying: Haiyo, you ah..must shut off ur CDplayer then u listen isit? haha! but it was kinda funny..what an encounter lol. God is good..haha..=/

MINISTRY/SERVICE

slept for 3hrs last night..woke up at 6am today..showered, got ready to serve. before i left my house..did ONE dry run for the songs for cg (which was after svc in e afternoon). haha i messed up e recording BIG TIME!

it was my first official recording duty..and i was tense! haha. whats worse than a first-time experience going wrong? is the fact that i did it alone! LOL. more or less alone..cus the guys who were supposed to look after me, one of em were doing e board, e other was on e comms.

well, basically we had a lack of manpower and my partner had to go somewhere else. so service started and my fingers were tense. im staring at 2 large panels of recording set equipments. to cut the long story short, the praise n worship only started recording AFTER the first song :S and the interpreter sermon CD started recording 5minutes after ps kong went up..lol..T_T

pressed wrong buttons, recording didnt start for one of e discs/started late..etc.

what else could go wrong? lol..forgetting to switch to new track and not paying enough attention to the volume levels..cus when e input exceeds or 'peaks', the sound will be distorted/cracky.

and towards e end of e service, when during e last praise song, i checked e CD..1min remaining. oh no..i asked them shld i change e CD? they said no need. thank God..when all was done..the CD was left with 4-5 seconds! haha..phew..*sweat.

then worse thing is..the interpreter CD suddenly popped out during e last praise song (almost end of service!) and the display put: DISC ERROR!

whoa! i almost fainted! haha. but thank God..really..what an adventure..haha. i was stressed, lol..but i was excited haha. SEVEN equipments im looking at..lol..and doing it for e first time..ALONE! haha. eventually thank God for elvin and shuxia..haha..

before svc, samuel gave me a 10min 'briefing' on how to do recording and basically all the recording knowledge was LUMPED into that 10min, into my brain! haha. and its not everything yet..i have yet to understand the pre-service procedures and post-service procedures..checking of mascot sets, paperwork, admin, burning, etc.

all in all, service was great today! =) presence of God was awesome XD i left immediately after service cus i had cg after that. wanna thank my bro for brining my guitar down, he went for make up cg btw..so yea..

CELGRP

today's cg meeting is probably the BEST cgm i have EVER had in a LOOONG TIME! Adam wanted a short 'happy-happy' cg meeting. but God NEVER does things your way..haha..He does it His way, and BETTER :pp yeah! haha..

well, i did a short quick dry run with adam and we prayed before cg. haha..its probably the SHORTEST time ive practised for a cg meeting LOL. once before leaving house..once before cgm started haha.

the 8-bit song was confusing haha..i started playing the wrong tempo..then adam restarted..then 2nd time, e ppl clapped wrongly..haha then adam restart again! LOL..so funny! so UNGLAM can? hahahaha..but i love it..we learn to laugh and learn from our own mistakes..haha.

my cg is unglam, but i love em! haha <3 now =")">CG OUTING/FELLOWSHIP

haha..while we were walking to e bus-stop at holland-V to go to PS for our movie, we had the "Mah-JuJa" incident LOL. haiyo..haha u serve the nation leh..oops LOL :pp. and when thad was saying a lame joke..then all of a sudden we LITERALLY heard a crow...hahahaha! so funny la.

hai..pohchoo and her toy..LOL. *crow sound..

reaching PS, me, pam, PC, adam, thad, thomas, elaine and timo..we met up with elaine's cousin caixia/kaixia haha i cant spell, pam's bro jeremy and liz and joyce. and we watched Harry. PC's version is Harry carrying a pot..LAME LA! How do you get Harry Potter? Just ask Thomas to carry a pot..hahaha.

i remembered something about the Happy Potter SMS incident also..haha. show was not bad. after e movie we chilled at the basement of Cathay. man..kaya toast with butter, half-boiled egg with soya sauce, iced mango drink and the crispy chicken from the (i think it is) taiwan little snacks stall or something..cant rem e name..

yummy! haha. had a cheap 90cents apple aloe vera too..haha. mebbe like adam and thomas, we shld try chilling somewhere with our 'mega' cup noodles..lol. its their childhood, so..i wanna experience it too :D haha.

its been soooo long since we really had, like adam said, a PROPER cg outing. haha. man i miss Jurong west days..when every week after service we could hangout somewhere, in church or in town from afternoon till night :)

because we now saturday svc and ppl are serving, and its late..its kinda hard to really have good quality time..and u know my love language is QT and WOA haha. we shld get out on sundays more often..have a proper meal with everyone, not just a few..go walk walk..and chillout someplace..joke around, chat around and be unglam haha..

ASSIGNMENT

this is e only thing that stresses me out..lol. imagine 2 people..doing this assignment which is as good as my final year project (which is normally 20 weeks). divided among us, each person do 10 weeks workload, squeezed within 2 weeks! man. its so unrealistic la..

i admit i couldnt finish..its just too many..but we tried our best. we are 'handicapped' lol..ppl had 4-5 people we only had 2. its considered quite okay for me, i guess. well, gotta finish report..submit before 9am today..

i just wanna pass this module and im happy already :S no more repeating =/ my head is spinning now..feels like im floating in circles..tink i better rest more x_x but i cant seem to finish everything..arrgh!

Service

all in all, it was good. reached at 245pm to queue with thad and elaine. i was surprised we went straight into the attibutes holding area, we didnt have to move in front to stop outside hall8 like we used to..oh ya, celebrated thomas' belated bdae and kaixia's bdae too XD

met wyelin outside hall 8 before svc..

one thing that stayed in me till now is one incident..it was 445pm and there were 2 sisters who needed seats. and i was there holding like e whole row with elaine and thad. and the sister approached me, very friendly, very nice.

and when i had to say 'im sorry' to her, because i couldnt give up e seats, i felt so bad, i couldve sworn i almost went into depression. i dun blame a few ppl for being late. its just that i feel as if im robbing someone of the presence and the blessing of God, i mean, they were there already and for me to not be able to give them any seats, i felt really bad..very hurt..

it felt as if i was sinning, because i robbed them of something they deserved. and when God is part of the picture..it just hurt. all in all, e PnW was good, we sang a few older songs and the sermon was simply awesome, yet at e same time convicting and disciplinary.

and best thing was when ps kong took e guitar and played..man..the atmosphere and e presence of God just saturated e whole hall!

next week is mike connell and then FOP. i always get worried during FOP because there will be 'pirated' christians..and i always try not to seat with them..rather sit with fellow cg/zone/church members. speaking of mike connell, haha, i remembered my first service..it was mike connell! LOL! and oh, A.R. Bernard is coming back soon! oh yeah!

fellowship was great..ive always loved talking abt e things of God with Adam and Thomas..its like e more i talk to them, the more interested and amazed i get, and i would just fall in love with God again..its just so amazing..we literally spent e whole night talking abt God..man we could go on forever! haha..it was great ^^

also, pohchoo and her new 'toy', adam and his 'bao jia wei guo' haha, oops im not supposed to broadcast haha. pam and her 'grafitti' pants (i call em vandalised pants x_x), timomo the blurmomo and super-high thad. haha..yes..thad was super high..must be e drink LOL! so funny la, we talked abt who would take over me after i go in.

and for some reason (no offence tho), when he mentioned timothy and tricia, it kinda cracked me up. then we were seeing who should take over me and stuff and other crazy funny cg stuff haha..u can ask him when u see him..lol

btw, ps kong is just amazing..he preached for chc emerge, taiwan emerge and then soon the euro conference then KL emerge! man..and he's also worried for Sun, yet he moved so powerfully today, and he was funny too! :)) He's just an amazing man..

tmr is ministry, then cg immediately after that, then fellowship at sentosa after that, then movie and dinner after that, then go home finish assignment after that..MAN! lol.

i need my beauty sleeep! okay ignore e beauty part..haha.

oh yes..special thanks to a friend for the letter..=)

this song makes me wanna watch the Cross DVD :D

Friday, CG

well, my bro couldnt make it for cg today and he's goin for make up cg at my cg on sunday. so its a last minute impromptu thingy, and Evan is still recovering so i helped her out to play during cg. e sermon was gd, though it was something ive heard before, but yet, its always fresh..theres always a word in season.

same message. but God spoke differently. all in all, it was good. the E110 feeling..haha gosh i miss u guys so much. its my first cg, and evan was my first cgl. all these while she was always my role model..much of who i am was credited to her being a good leader in my life :D even adam my current leader will agree to cus me and adam were once in e same cg =)

heard josh share his testimony about how he was so blessed from e taiwan emerge even as he served. man..i really WANNA go there one day!!! oh btw, chc emerge is over, taiwan emerge is over, i really hope i can go for the KL emerge tts coming up :D haha..400 bucks only..compared to taiwan emerge which is more than 1k.

well, it falls in my exam period i guess :S but i really wanna go for both KL emerge and Taiwan Emerge, at least once before i turn 25 haha. XDD im looking forward to svc tmr. yea. ps kong is back. cant wait for him to share his experience in taiwan :D

and one more thing..tt Queenie ah..call me sister andrew! ROAR! hahaha. who invented that name again? i cant rem..haha. its a very old nick that lay dormant ever since i stepped into E406 then E420, lol. somehow she revived it O_O

brother queenie..bleah =p

Indigo Prophecy, Projects

the last page is killing me. and the additional functions are just unbearable for a 2-man team. we are the only 2-man team..while everyone else had 4-5 people. one person doing one function. we had to each do 2-3 pages.

and one page could last forever..

Being a shamgar is hard..our workload is the same as that of a 4-6man team.

no cg on friday, instead its on sunday. kinda clashed with ministry..looking for replacement.

this soundtrack was the main theme song for Indigo Prophecy. a new game i bought a few days back. its based on a mysterious murder case. for more info just visit this site:

http://www.atari.com/indigo

definitely a game worth playing. its been like more than a year i think that i bought for myself an ORIGINAL game..haa. there's a youtube trailer in my videos section. the original one u can get frm e website..

stressed.

1 more page..one whole book of methods

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!

That one last page is gonna take forever!!!!!!

So many functions!!!!!! AHHHHHH I WANNA DIEEEEEEEEE...

1 more day..ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

whats worse than e feeling of being screwed?

its e fact tt because of me, someone else is gonna be screwed!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

Hahahahahaha!

Game over.

Stoned and moodless

Im tired. I dont wanna struggle anymore. Ill just sit back and relax..saves my energy, lengthens my life and prevents white hair or pimples. o.o No point getting stressed for nothing. Its doing more harm than good..

im just gonna pretend nothing happened. id rather live a lie thats happy than to live the reality that hurts. in case u havent noticed..when im down, i dun show it to anyone. when im hurt, i dont show it to anyone. when im stressed, i try my best not to show it.

ive always confronted it on my own.

im tired. yet i always wanna be able to stand on my own two feet. mebbe its partially because some ppl look up to me, thats why i cant seem to be able to show a weaker side of me. guess i can always talk to e wall or to my reflection or to God.

im sure thats enough right? no. i came to realise i cant live on my own. but what can i do? ive not been running for 2 weeks now. that sucks. not only im broke, im fat. yea, gd luck to all your anti-fats program..what i need now is an anti-stress program..

i do silly things under stress. im not at optimum condition under stress. i cant think straight, and sometimes, i cant walk straight. im paralyzed by stress. ohhh stop telling me i need to change. i have been changing ever since the day i was born.

its like saying to a meowing cat, you need to meow man. its like telling a barking dog to bark. or..to say "Look we have to boil the boiled water." HELLO? HAVE YOU LOST YOUR BRAIN? God gave you eyes and a brain for goodness sake. instead of telling me i need to change, why dont you use your God-given brain and tell me that my situation has to change?

You have a BRAIN right? You have a mouth right? even though it stinks! but still, its a mouth. if you cant accept me for my weaknesses i wont respect you for your strengths. you GONG or what? im sick and tired of all the nonsense.

im stressed. dont act like im perfect. i HATE people who think im ideal or perfect. IM NOT! im just a below average guy okay? Only God is perfect. If im sooooo ideal and perfect? are you gonna worship me then? no right? once again i cant stand people with no common sense!

if something doesnt work, it doesnt work. ARE YOU INSANE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!?! you are worse than people in the asylum! at least when something doesnt work, they try something else! sometimes i just feel like smashing people's heads. WAKE UP YOUR IDEA!

When you shit, you dont eat your own shit right? you clean it up! USE UR BLAIN, USE UR BLAIN!!!!!!! im not smarter, I JUST USE MY BRAIN MORE!

as for my assignments, im gonna take it easy. im not gonna cause unnecessary harm to myself anymore. i hardly talked to anyone this week so, yea..count me as someone who is deprived.

everyone's so busy, guess ill just mind my own business. o.o

i may not stand programming, but ill take it.

Breaking up

Woke up late.
Didnt bring spare change for NAPFA.
Think im not going NAPFA.
Banged my knee joint against a hard surface on the bus.
Tomorrow submit assignment
1 more assignment by friday.
Forgot today got class test.
Yesterday's test was screwed.
The formula is given during the final exam.
The teacher didnt give us the formula.
He didnt tell the whole class.
We got screwed.
To enter year 5 is something,
To be expelled is another thing.
If you think im making excuses, screw you!
If you think life and death is an excuse, **** you!
I dont care if you take life lightly, i take things seriously!
Went to Swensons JP with thad, tim, pam and liz.
Thank God for cgm :) Felt better yesterday.
Today, history repeats itself.
Received warning letter today.
I cant take it anymore.
I cant think straight.
Screw programming!

Screwed

For the same module..i screwed up last time.
For the same module..i screwed the assignment.
Once again, for the same module..i forgot to bring my calculator.
Test in 1hr's time.
Im screwed.
Year 5 sounds good..
NAPFA tmr.
Lost my appetite.
Lost my mood.
I can cope with stress, I just cant think straight under stress!
Just now i was walking and i went sideways and almost banged into e pillar.
That's it..

6th Post

feeling very moodless now..

it seemed that when im high, im the only one there. feels like.."nobody can click with you" that kind of feeling. eventually, not being able to find anyone to talk to..i plunged. now i dont feel like doing anything..i only slept 3hrs last night..

and my eyes feel like they're bursting now, and all red. and i have 2 assignments to finish, one test and a run to do. all in 5 hours. this will probably be my final post today.

all this while..what have i been doing? studying? yes..for what reason? for the sake of studying. i given up on IT one year ago. what I learn now, is irrelevant 2-3years time. i just feel that ive wasted 4 years of my life..doing nothing but pointless programming..

i dont see any future in the history. everyone's reminding me of their graduations..all the NS, all the celebrations. and here i am, rotting 4 years of my life away. i couldve used it to do soo much more!!

you dont need skill to master programming..you just need foolishness to make the decision to take IT in e first place T_T. i dont want to continue anymore..

Insane Randomness

Act 1

Dear Mr Billgates,
Im glad that you've received my lovely gift.
The brand new ASP underwear withe a big red heart in front,
And the words, "I Love You" at the back.
Aww...(^.^)

Yours sincerely,
With lots of saliva,
Andrew.

Act 2

Im not gay.
Im not les.
But I love humans.
So what am I?
Im a Hugaylesman.

Act 3

The assignment and tests are driving nuts.
"Ehh..ello mister Assitest, im afraid you have been sa-man-ed..."
"Oh nooooo! I think I just had a miscarriage and uh-uh-uh, my waterbag burst!"

Act 4

Go-go-power-ranger! Ta-dada-dada-da..
Aiya! My morpher no battery leh! How ah?
*KABOOM!
Aiya! Wa eh nehneh ah!

Act 5

I think I need deliverance from a very powerful spirit.
The Programmo Spirit.
"Come out!"
"Dim For String Integer Exit Conn Error! Beep! Beep! Beep! Noooooooooo..."
*KABOOM!

PS: This post shall be updated as the stress and insanity becomes greater.

Chilli Crab!

ohhhhh crab..i think im gonna scream now..

i jus remembered i have a test this week...TOMORROW! ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! *PANIC *Beep beep beep!!! *bangs head on the wall! eeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkk!!!

2 assignments to submit by this week and one test in less than 24hours! ahhhhh! ZOMG nooooooo i dun wanna end my life like this T_T ^.O

oh deeerrr..*meh meh..oops, thats lamb! O_O forget it..haha..

oh nooooooeeeeeeee!!!! ahhhhhhh!! have to do my running, have to finish last part of assignment 1/2, have to study for test..WITHIN 5 hours!!!! before i sleep!

graaah..this is not impossible..this is gimpossible..(Giga-impossible)..

okay, i made that up o.o

if u were thinking id post something on food..NANNYNANNYPOOPOO! X_X

Moodless

the assignment is killing me..my other assignment killed me.

i dont mind programming, its the errors i cant stand..never mind, i shall sit..lol. oh wait, im already seated! O_O

whats with today? no progress. hopefully my assignment move a bit later. o.o just FYI, my phone is cocked. either SMSes i receive are delayed, or SMSes i send dont get through. tts what happens when u have a battery coverless handphone and u drop it..=/

another thing, i dun reply to smses from unknown numbers or call back house numbers. (unless i know who they belong to). also dont come to me asking me why i never answer your calls if you use a 'private' (or some hidden) number all the time! its just ridiculous..i divert your calls to 999 then you know..nah jk..

oh ya, btw just now, when i reached home..e maid prepared dinner outside in e living rm..so i went there and AFTER i had finished drinking the cup of ribena, i noticed some white sticky stuff stuck onto the inner bottom sides of the cup!!!

i almost stunned for a moment..white stuff in a drink..:S poison or detergent? =/ anyway, im thinkin its detergent lol..it didnt look like it dissolved into my drink..O_O

im surrounded by random things and random people, weird things and weird people..lol..

Sunday? Monday? Noday?

okay, today was boring..apart from watching this morning's service..

at first i got the mood to program my assignment..then i keep on getting compilation error and i have no clue whatsoever what went wrong! not only that, NOBODY OUT THERE knows how to solve ASP.NET problems!

ive been staring at e codes until i can comb armani on my eyelashes! and my eyebrows have grown so long they could sweep the floor!

grr..so mad! i hate programming..lol. Andrew doing programming is like asking a guy to menstruate! so furious can? people cant make me angry, but programming can kill me! O_O

im always on my own..all programmers are LONERS! luuuuuneley..im suuu luuuuuneley!

hurhurhur! ^.O

not bad, at least just now went to Olivia's house for dinner (Sunday), my parents are overseas since friday for a cruise and they coming back tonight (monday) so her mum cooked for us. thank God for PSP too lol.

arrgh, i feel like pulling my hair out!! up there and down there and everywhere! soooo maaaaad, waaaaaah! LOL. im going nuts. pardon my nuttiness..

and my NAPFA! wooootz! i only ran once last week! SO FATTENING LA. O_O i tink tomorrow i can bounce to school or something..later i mean..

speaking of nuttiness..The Nutty Professor..yes! i tink not only will i become a Nutty Programmer, ill soon look like one too! O_O

why do some people laugh "WAKAKA"?
you know whyyyy? u wanna noe whyyyyy?

cus they saw a cockroach and they didnt know whether to laugh or to cry ^.O

"wa! kaka!" okay, not funny..i know im doing my best. thank you. seriously..if its not e weather that drives me mad, its programming!

why some people say laughing hehehe is a abit gay/tiko? because when a girl is 'cornered' by a guy, she will go..'he..! he..! he..!' okay, not funny..ARRGH!

and guess what..even if i manage to solve that compilation error..theres still one more assignment that i havent even started and its also ASP.NET! ahhhhhhhh!

Fellow ladies and gentlemen,

Let us observe a moment of silence as I begin to shriek like a prostitute:

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkk!!!

Update

man service 2's sermon was great! and God moved in a different way. and the nursery ryhmes thingy was so funny! haha. really learned alot..that its not:

what goes up, comes down

but its:

what goes down, comes up

what the world sees as destruction, we expect the resurrection. man, thats powerful stuff. and it really spoke to me and blessed me so much. kinda reminded me, what do you do when things go from bad to worse? do you see destruction? or do you believe in the resurrection?

the God you serve will determine the kind of life you live. many religions preach and teach, but only Christianity has good news, only christianity has the gospel, only christianity has the miracles of God.

but more than that, Christianity is not a religion, its a relationship. its not what you know, its WHO you know! towards e end of e service, God moved PS R.Roberts to move in a different direction..something i have never expected before in my 4yrs in church..

praying in e spirit is good, but praying in our understanding is just as important. when you have the two combined..you realise that indeed the Holy Spirit CAN pray through you. praying in the spirit is wonderful, but when we begin to pray in the understanding after praying in e spirit, we will begin to receive understanding and powerful interpretations of what we actually prayed..

and thats so powerful. Ps Richard wasnt talking about the charismata..he wasnt talking abt e 9 gifts of the spirit (tongues and interpretation), he was talking about personal intimacy and effectiveness of our daily prayer life.

im so blessed..and i feel we really have to move on to another level..

we are not a bunch of people who stay at where we are, we dont stay at a level where everyone stays at, we are not mediocre because God is not mediocre. we are not afraid to step out, and we dont care what others think..we dont do things their way, we do things GOD's way!

who are you living for today?

NYP Symphonic Band, Service

went to support Jo on her NYP SBand performance. haha it was good. even though i was kinda late for 10min cus of my lack of experience and planning..

making a big mistake by taking the train from Boonlay to YioChuKang via JE. even though its not as far as bishan but it was bad enough..lol. anyway, lesson learned. haha. PC wanted me to blog about the 'famous' percussionists..haha..

so funny! but i think its really cool! xD 'we can dance too..' hahaha..the zombified hypno-dance.., thats what i call it LOL. and the screams..LMAO. so creative..:pp

the last song was kinda long..haha tt elaine go and time the song..15min O_O lol..i nv even thought of timing e songs..:o

anyway, assignments and all..but i thought to myself, relationship precedes ministry, so i went down to support. =)) what's important is not whether a person is contributing or not, what's important is that e person is there :D

what you do, what you say, what you give, can NEVER be compared to the person himself/herself :)) anyway, service today was great..

Ps Richard Roberts was great. i was sooo awake right from the start of e service all e way to e end. people were healed and ministered..even during the word. so amazing. it was then that i thought to myself, thats how common miracles should be!

the people in Acts..experienced miracles sooo much, that miracles became part and parcel of life. that God had to perform UNUSUAL miracles. we hardly see miracles, let alone unusual ones. tell u e truth, ive not seen an unusual miracle myself..:O

we really need to move up to another level. like what last wk's msg said, its not just about living the 'normal' life..what is it that we can do MORE than others? what is it that we can do that will make us DIFFERENT?

its not just about breaking new grounds, its about MAKING new grounds..doing what nobody has done before. (reminds me: ...to exceed the scribes...)

back to today, after svc we went to bk @ changi airport to makan. tried e 'new' Bk Fish meal..haha i dun recall anything different..but its still nice haha. Thad was telling me, fried fish is more unhealthy than fried chicken..but grilled fish is healthier than grilled chicken..

something to do with the 'healthy fats' and 'unhealthy fats'..cant rem the biological term for it..but yea. lol. anyway, ya..the crazy 'crowns' and the 'thai goddess' insanism. lol. (okay i made that word up..LOL).

btw, some ppl were telling me i have white hair..i dunno if its the bleach on my hair or its e stress. either way, e first time i heard it i got shocked. :S

noooooooooo..T_T

tol..

(if u wanna know what is TOL, refer to my video section :pp)

Celgrp (Updated)

it was good. starting everyone was like a bit shagged..mebbe cus its e end of e week, either that or bcos the next day is friday and its a bit weird having cg on thursday..in e midst of a hectic schedule. but e Word was gd =)

Gosh, i think im addicted to Nutella haha..anyway's Liz's mum's porridge was good today. and thx Liz for always letting us use ur house :D Assignments..grr..rush..

Anyway, later tonight going down to NYP to support Jolene during her concert. cant rem e last time i went for a concert lol. Itll be weird though..not having cg on friday..haha, oh wells.

for those who encouraged me, thanks. told u ill be fine within 24hrs..lols. i dun really need anyone to say anything, i dun really need anyone to do anything..what's important is that ure there, im more than satisfied. =)

im really a simple guy, and a 'low maintenance' one..lol. dun have to do much, im very easily satisfied and i feel uncomfortable when someone goes all out to make me happy..i appreciate it..but its really okay with me..lol.

i keep on thinkin tmr is saturday..haiyo..lol..

Winning doesnt make u a winner.
Losing doesnt make u a loser.

It's my 'revelation of the week' haha..not that ive not heard it before, but when it comes as a rhema, ur life will never be e same heh..XD

UPDATED

oh ya..something funny happened at the MRT station..haha, PM me if u wanna noe :pp by the way, on my friendster it says im a fan of 'Cheam'. ehh, i dunno how i got that there and i cant seem to remove it :S ahh! lol..=/

PL: jiayou! =)) even though too much oil is fattening..anyway..ya..haha..

Bored. Tired. Stressed. Dont care. Moodless.

For some reason, ive not been talking to anyone lately.

Stupid assignment..makes me totally moodless. For now, i just feel anti-social. I dunno how to start, i dunno what to do. My previous assignment i blew it. It was a solo assignment and for some reason both me and my friend thought it was a group assignment..

And only to realise it was individual and there was only one copy submitted. "If you want, you can either divide the grade by half or distribute the grades according to work done.."

I was stoned. I lost my mood..lost my passion..lost my dream..it was really nice of Sam to divide the assignment into half..and we both agreed. If we got a C and below, chances are we might fail.

2 As gone..looks like i wont be getting any A this sem..:(( Feeling damn emo now. How am i gonna play for CG? everytime its like that! im sick and tired of it! I havent touched my assignment which is due e following week..and e other assignment thats due this wk, i cant be bothered to finish it..

I CANT STAND IT! no matter how hard i try, STUPID CIRCUMSTANCES always take away my As!!!! i feel like screaming the f-word now..im sick and tired!!!!! DAMN SICK!!!! in my 4 years of poly..SCREW CIRCUMSTANCES.

First, i failed because my laptop was down, and they said: "Sorry, laptop breakdown is no excuse". Secondly, i failed because i missed the test, not because i woke up late..but because I thought it was the day after! When im stressed, i lose my brainpower..and now this assignment..and the previous one..im sick and tired..

i feel so helpless..so powerless..im giving in my A-effort, but screw it..i cant control circumstances..i cant control when my laptop is gonna fail me..i cant blame anyone for my STM, ya..im a sotong who doesnt know whats going on..

im always blur and lagging. God, why use me? look at me..i suck at everything..why choose me? there are so many smarter out there..there are so many more talented out there, more good looking out there, more richer out there..why me? God, why? T_T

im just sitting at my comp..stoning..im sick of programming..

ive been doing NOTHING productive except programming and re-learning stupid codes and programming languages!!! NO PRODUCTIVITY! NO PROGRESS! im sick of it, im tired of it! Screw IT..it changes every 2-3 years so what you learn become outdated/redundant..then they ask u learn something new..

THATS CHILD ABUSE I TELL YOU! YOU ROB ME OF MY FUTURE! YOU MAKE ME GO IN CIRCLES ONLY TO COME BACK AT THE SAME SPOT!

I see people graduating, i see people going into army..and what am i doing? PROGRAMMING! 2 years ago, i already told myself..i wanna quit! ive endured for 2 long years..those days where i had 400 days WITHOUT BREAK!

yes..400 days without break..did one whole semester..then final exam, then immediately after the exam, is 5-6months of FYP which i blew..NO BREAK! Give me a bomb and i will bomb Billgates' palace or something..

i feel like breaking down now..i cannot take it anymore..im afraid i might lose all my brain and end up at woodbridge or something..totally retarded and vegetized. 4 years of insanity..not only its driving me nuts, yes im becoming more lamer..why?

not because i like to joke coldly..IM TIRED OF IT, dont you get it!?! its getting to me. and NAPFA is calling me. tell u e truth..i feel very lonely now..

life will never be the same again..

who will hang around someone who's cold and emo all the time?
who will hang around someone who's broke?
who will hang around someone who's dreams are destroyed?
who will hang around someone who does nothing but camp at his comp whole day?

there are people out there more fun, more goodlooking, more talented..have a brighter future. you will never see me as someone whos fun to hang out with..never. i hardly speak and i keep to myself. i just wanna give up now..

Emerge Conference (MISSED)

Missed =)) I wanna go for Taiwan Emerge one day! Before I turn 25 :S

Keep praying for Taiwan Emerge. XDD

Credits to http://www.chc.org.sg

Taiwan Emerge 2007

This week is taiwan emerge..pray for Ps and the Team :))

Let China be saved..let there be the greatest revival in our generation!!

One life..we lay at Your altar!

One love..I have with you!

One word, you know I will follow!

=))

Assignments

arrgh they have started! and LOADS of it. the world may be short of raw materials, the world may be short of food, but the world will never be short of assignments! arrgh! lols.

something funny happened this morning. well, not exactly funny, just..random. o.o

i was boarding e train on my way to school, then a lady suddenly 'sneaked' behind me and started talking loudly to herself! :O oh man, i rem what happened yesterday and i really want to run away, retreat, go home! haha..so freaky man.

and then as i sat on e seats inside e train..lo and behold, that lady sat across me. she was still talking to herself..omg..deliver me from strange and mad women! LOL.

then i saw something!!! yess!!! i can see!!! i so happened to glanced at her long hair..when i saw one THIN little wire that seemed slightly thicker than her hair..it was hidden behind her hair that covered her ears..and..REVELATION..

A HEADSET!!! WTHZOMGBBQNOOOOO! its so clearly hidden la! omg i feel like a clown..haha. luckily i never act weird lol. anyway, ya..i cant seem to get started on those assignments..

ive been 'assigned' for FOUR YEARS ALREADY! T_T so assigning me and start teaching me!!! lol. had my run today, felt better after a nice good and 'hot' run..once again, the sky looked as if it was gonna rain..but it didnt..awww..haha..

grr..booooooooring..its so boring that im becoming a wild boar! ooookay, that didnt make sense O_O. oh wells, will blog again tmr..lol..later i mean m_m

Cupid test? LOL

The Slow Dancer

Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLD)

Steady, reliable, and cradling her tenderly. Take a deep breath, and let it out real easy...you are The Slow Dancer.

Your focus is love, not sex, and for your age, you have average experience. But you're a great, thoughtful guy, and your love life improves every year. There's also a powerful elimination process working in your favor: most Playboy types get stuck raising unwanted kids before you even begin settling down. The women left over will be hot and yours. Your ideal woman is someone intimate, intelligent, and very supportive.

While you're not exactly the life of the party, you do thrive in small groups of smart people. Your circle of friends is extra tight and it's HIGHLY likely they're just like you. You appreciate symmetry in relationships.

Your exact male opposite: The hornivore (Random Brutal Sex Master)

Always avoid: The Battleaxe (DBLM)

Consider: The Maid of Honor (DGLM) or The Sonnet (DGLD)


LOL that Cinth ask me to do this haha..BORED.

http://www.okcupid.com/online.dating.persona.test

Eh..the 'hornivore' lame la..lols

Michael Angelo Batio - 2x

I love this intrumental piece..haha

Guitar 'god' LOL..rated the world's fastest shredder..and he's so CLEAN! haha. im talkin abt his notes when he does his sweeps/legatto/appegios/etc.

http://www.angelo.com/

search for 'michael angelo batio' on youtube for some of his vids and live guitar shows.

I love 'Bonjour' choc chip loaf with condensed milk and a cup of aloe vera apple juice. :D

*random

Update

note that i dun wanna mention abt a friend of mine, not because im against or i hate the person. i have never hated e person. i dont hate anyone for that matter. if what im saying is hurting u, then its best i dont say it. because like ive said, i dont want to hurt anyone. why there are times im quiet?

not because im weird. not because im fake. but because if i were to say something..someone might get offended. so id rather not say anything than to say something stupid. and u know me, if someone is hurt, ill go into depression. i can get out in 24hrs but e person might not be able to handle it.

you are still my friend, and i still love you despite our differences. but like ps said, why gain the whole world and lose ur own soul? im sorry i failed to make u happy. even though i smiled when i didnt feel like..even though i sacrificed until i have nothing left..

i have given u my all..and if thats not enough, im sorry i cant do anything more. i have nothing left. if u feel that im nothing but trouble. tell me. im willing to be hurt by you than for you to be hurt by me. i dont want to hurt anymore. u think i enjoy it? no. im broken, when ure hurt. im broken when ure not happy. im hurt, both ways.

if u can find someone better than me..im fine with it. as long as ure happy. thats all that matters. id rather suffer to make u happy than to be happy when ure down. i dont mind being a punching bag. because i know i can take it..always have..always will.

the greatest hurt is not the regret of hurting someone..but the knowing that someone is 'accidentally' hurt when u have NO INTENTION at all. yes, im going down again..and im not going to take anyone down with me. ill just go down alone..

im sorry i failed as a friend. as a brother. i dont really bother anymore..im not going to defend myself anymore. especially when ure the ONLY person who feels hurt by me in 10 years.

everytime when sch ends and i see: why u nv reply me???
everytime my quiet time ends and i see: why u nv reply me???
u know how hurting it is? in one second! the presence of God leaves..the joy leaves..
its like i didnt mean to..but im made as if u INTENDED to..

how do i reply? i cant reply. everytime i see those smses..it breaks me. because i didnt intend to NOT reply. and it sounds as if i didnt WANT to reply. and the person insists, 100% confirm, FEELS that i didnt want to reply. what can i do?

yet, i pick up my pieces and still smile. then it breaks again..everyday, one by one..im broken and pieced, broken and pieced together. everytime the fragments gets smaller and smaller..and there will come a point when one day, i can never be pieced together again..

spiritual murder? ive been murdered many times..did i retaliate? no. i just let them hurt me. like Jesus being led to the Cross..He didnt say a single word. He willingly went the extra mile.

i wanna be like Him..to pick up my cross daily and follow Him. just like how He laid down His life for His friends. i wanna do the same.

God, give me greater capacity..its not just my friend. i wanna increase in every aspect to be an example in the celgrp as well. that im not someone who just talk the talk, i wanna walk the walk. people are looking at me..there are those who look up to me.

and when they need me. i will be there. ill do my best. even if i fail, i learn and become better. im afraid to fail. its better to fail now than to fail for all eternity.

i just wanna thank 5 people in my life.

thank you God, for being there for me. for being my strength and hope. for being everything to me. and thank you Adam, Pam, trish, Timo..for being people who live by example. sometimes when u tell me, that ure blessed because of me, i feel that without you, i wouldnt be where i am.

yes there are times of breaking, but unless the bottle is broken, the fragrance of Christ cannot flow. Adam's been someone whos not afraid to offend and confront my mistakes. and i treasure every moment of breaking..haha. even though im a cgguitarist, even though i can bring down e presence of God..

but i always tell myself, that its never me, its God. im just an instrument. and im gonna be honest about this. there's always something i can learn from u guys. i may be 'strong' in some areas, but in those areas im weak at, i can learn from u guys. just like Jacob. i wanna have what u have..

adam, i wanna have ur boldness. pam, i wanna have a pure heart, a heart of flesh a heart that's bigger. and timo, a commitment to each other. no doubt i can say im committed in some ways, but i can always be better. i will never say: see? i got a cg position, all u are below me..NO. never..im always at the bottom, just doing my part to make the celgrp work.

and trish..i want your 'unbreakable'ness..haha..

and i believe, as we covet each other's gifts (e bible says covet spiritual gifts)..we will see the greatest revival, this celgrp has ever seen! =))

i like what Dr Peter Wagner said, its one thing to be kingdom-minded, its another thing to be kingdom-motivated. and more than just being discipled, we need to be EQUIPPED. and the only way to be fully equipped, its to learn from people around me. every celgrp member has a gift i dont have..i can always learn something from everyone..even the newest member..

not because im greedy or perfectionist..but because im hungry for more of God..im thirsting for a revival. i wanna be like Shamgar, one man..can make a difference! but together, we can take the marketplace! XD

Service 2, Ministry

esnips seem to be failing me lol. so i switched back to my own private hosting site, and of course..back to the mediaplayer.

woke up late today. not that i didnt set my alarm clock. but i found my handphone on the floor with the battery out of its place. either i slide it off the bed during my sleep, or it vibrated and dropped. so my bro woke me up. not bad..managed to reach during sound check.

did webcast today. last minute i was changed to conference to replace someone. but he came in e end so they put me back into webcast. its kinda slack cus e other webcast guy did everything. :x i dun like to be there but not involved. being a spectator is one thing, being a participator is another thing.

sermon was great. challenging, and definitely life transforming. after service met up with cg at this ulu bedok market..haha..okay la, not ulu, stalls just closing and all. thx guys for waiting..love ya loads <3

i didnt take long to finish my food either so i guess its okay..haha. jus had something light as i only slept 2hrs plus e night before. and oh, i met chingfeng on the train this morning haha..so cool. just now on e train with pam, we chatted our way home. but then suddenly got this lady a bit..'different' haha..suddenly just walked past us and started scolding the air or something..

dunno what jiat-sai haha..so loud somemore..i dunno who she scolding also. just scolding e air..then everyone was like staring. lol. so weird. luckily the lady was at another cabin beside us..haha. freaky. X_X. but today's message was gd..i didnt despise that lady even though she was different, after all..if God loves her, who am i to hate her?

what impressed me e most today was the part where let ur yes be a yes, and ur no, a no. anything other than that that is e devil. that really struck me. yes! no more shallow christianity! either ure hot, or ure cold. dont be lukewarm! something ill always remember..

thats why when i said ill come for lunch with my cg, i make sure i turn up..lol. even though i was tired, even though e walking distance was 'tiring' haha..no regrets..i still went there. i was like sleep-eating, haha..but e carrot cake was nice..the cai-po got alot :DD

tmr gonna start my new assignment with my new 'friend' haha. those who know who im talking abt..sshhh..hahaha..so embarrassing la..i didnt know until like..whoa..lol. with man, it is impossible, but with God, ALL things are possible! haha :))

i received a revelation yesterday as i was praying..okay, its not really new, but it came at e right time. they say, "Your life today is the result of choices made yesterday".

and that rhema i received was this:

"What you want your life to be tomorrow, you make the choice TODAY!" No excuse, no procrastination. Dont feel, dont think, dont reason, just do, like the Nike brand motto. and i suddenly remembered what one of e guest speakers once said:

God said it, I believe it, that settles it. nothing more. nothing less.

napfa in one wk's time! woot haha.

someone's been offended by my random posts. i dunno why, i dunno how. but for the sake of the person. ill not blog anything abt e person again or even mention the person anymore. until e person grants me her permission. so from now on, my posts will be a bit shorter. :) anything that's not good, its best to cut it away.

then again, for those who have been blessed 'somehow' haha..praise God. i duno why but there was once wei ming was MSNing me saying how God spoke to Him through my nick. and u know, my nick is always random. since when im not random? lol..ya..i was kinda surprised and i thought..wow..thx bro :)

Service and lessons learnt! (LONG POST)

Hmm i dunno what happened to the Ed Silvoso thingy..my friend said he preached at FCBC. erm..ookay..so..hmm..i blur haha. anyway, saw wyelin today..haha..we were like stoned or something lol..mebbe its just me..haha.

anyway, service was great. back in hall 8! and its been so long since, i felt such tangible presence of God. i wept during worship, even when i prayed..i prayed so hard that tears were 'squeezed' out of my eyes..deep calling unto deep, the hunger for more of God, the hunger for a breakthrough, for God to bring us to a whole new level!

this song is just so meaningful to me. i remembered the first time i gave my heart to Jesus. my first love..its something ive caught once again today. message was strong, convicting, and definitely life changing. ive looked at the 10 commandments at a whole new perspective. ive heard ps kong preach before, but this time, its different..

you can hear e same message, but e revelation is always fresh, different, in season, in the kairos moment a rhema at the right time that will change your life. this svc almost dealt with every weak area of my life and i was so blessed and ministered..

i remembered what adam said during cgm last night..when ur foundation is on God the solid rock, your life will never be shaken. but if your foundation is on man, then when they fade, you will fade along with them. its not what you believe, its WHO you believe!

i was also reminded many things ps said during the marriage seminar. that communication is the key and you can NEVER assume that people know what you are thinking. if you fail to communicate, you fail in a relationship. and my relationship with God, is like a marriage, a covenant..even though there are times i failed, but He held strong, His hand was always there for me.

similarly, today's msg, was abt dealing with hurts and anger. you can hear in hear out. you can be a hearer without being a DOER! thats why i hardly get angry..not because im hiding it, but because i deal with it before the sun sets. i always keep my emotions in check and i know what i should think what i shouldnt think.

people always tell me, i feel this, i feel that..SO WHAT. im someone who dont care what i feel, when im down, i dont care how i feel, all i feel is the heartbeat of God. its not about what you feel, its about what you KNOW. its not about you, its about GOD!

Going to church is not just 'feed me', but its about serving others! its about placing the lives of others before yourself, that without God, you are nothing. but with God, all things are possible. and during e sermon i felt as if God was discipling me.

many times i feel many things..but adam was always there to correct me. "I DONT CARE WHAT YOU ARE FEELING. What would God do?" at first i thought, man, thats something harsh to say to me, but i realised, he was right. "You feel this way because you choose to! God gave you emotions to control, so DONT BLAME OTHERS. Nobody can change your attitude, not even God, only you.."

those days when i was down, those days when Adam was there to challenge me, to confront my mistakes, really helped me grow into a stronger person. now im not so easily shaken, because i know who God is. ps Tan once said, if you dont know the CHARACTER of God, you will make foolish decisions! nobody can make you feel this or that..im happy because i choose to!

my life changed because i CHOSE to. man will let you down but GOD will never let you down. stop making excuses and start DOING SOMETHING WITH YOUR LIFE! thats what Adam would always tell me, and he's not afraid to tell me right in my face. because he knows i wont be broken so easily..that im someone strong and can handle discipleship.

and i did. i learned. and i change. i also learned that DONT MAKE ASSUMPTIONS. stop thinking! stop feeling! start KNOWING! the immature live by feelings and experience, the mature live by truth and revelation! the mark of true maturity is the ability to be led by the Spirit. sometimes, when bad things happen.

we always tend to blame others. people around you are changing..but your situation remains the same. why? everything has changed, except you. its like taking a quadratic equation and factorising it. and you realise u face the same thing with EVERYONE ELSE! people change, settings change, circumstances change, but if YOU yourself dont change, NOTHING will change!

today's service really made me embrace a while new perspective. no more shallow christianity..and no more shallow christians. we are people of destiny! POD! haha.

oh yes, one more thing i learned all this time, adam will tell me: You HAVE NOT, because you ASK NOT. so dont blame others. dont expect people to read your mind! cus they are not God. UNLESS THEY ARE YOUR GOD!

that totally convicted me. like what i learned during cg message, who is your god?

the most dangerous thing is not crisis, but an EXPECTATION-ASSUMPTION. you assume something, then you expect something/someone to do something. its as good as a life built on an opinion, to live a lie, to build a house on the sand. when the storms come, you get blown away.

today i renewed my 'marriage covenant' with God :) today after service had debrief..then met QY. she looked like she's seen a ghost or something..like she gonna commit murder like that..lol. then send weird smses..more random than me..lol.

went for toilet break. then cg went to bedok for makan. its been awhile since we last went there..lol. watermelon ice! haha. the food made me pregnant X_X. i dunno whats with miss liang 'pontianak' popo and miss 'sexyvoice' aka female bodybuilder! hahaha!!! i think ive been knocked off my 'frozen throne' haha.

if u tink a lame guy is scary..wait till u see a lame girl LOL. especially is the 'unglam' type..haha..i dunno whats with the unglam thing..i think unglam is like the 'in' thing for my cg now la..haha.

lame and unglam! nice combo! :pp

everyone different flow la..lol. then on the train got this weird malay guy..so unglam can! haha. okay, basically the whole journey was 'unglam' LOL. met up with Ting also, accompanied her..haha. Hmm, i shant talk abt boon lay..haha. its a place that 'appeals to the senses' lol. itll sound bad so i shant say it..haha.

serving webcast later..woo..haha. 530am!!! CHIONG!!! lol. i have a feeling ill wake up late..lol. nonono..cannot..i know i CAN wake up! =))

NavyDNA Theme

Finally a color theme thats not so 'dull'.

Anyway was thinking what color sets to use and Id thought..

FMSS? haha..okay..added a little green to it..lol.

Oh yes, and Ive revamped my eSnips player as well.

CG

because of last minute adjustments. i didnt play for cg today. partly cus we had people who couldnt come and adam needed me to help build atmosphere. also today's a post-outreach 'relag-relag' cg meeting. message was short..but powerful.

played a few interesting games..i personally didnt get to learn the 99-game but i thought it was fun and yet challenging. tricia's 'random' game was a stoner for me..i was half asleep while trying to figure out the colors/words and all..

then adam's version of the 'concentration' game..where we would give a name of a fruit for ourselves and must be at least 2 syllables. when we say our fruit names or the fruit names of others, at all times, we must not show our teeth, or laugh. so funny la..John and his weird tones..and out-of-this-world pronounciation haha...

svc is back to hall 8. which means queueing is back to 'the oven'. ^.O who knows what forms of insanity im gonna take. the heat is already mutating and evolving my sanity control functional system..haha..*okay, i made that up..X_X

this wk is Ed Silvoso. i dunno why but everytime i think of his name, i keep on thinking of Fort Siloso..O_O

Pre-CG

celgrp's gonna be at bishan again, for some reason. yesterday jolene was asking me for the lyrics of Falling and Breakaway. that was pretty early and i havent asked for e song yet. and since jolene knew the songs, shed probably asked adam already. so i thought..yea tts cool.

then out of instinct and intuition, i decided to ask adam for the songs even though i knew it already just to see if things will work out as they used to. and to my surprise, all he said was, 'ill let u noe again in due time'..

in due time..is there something going on that i dont know about? anyway, i shant bother too much also. i have to get used to this kind of thing. for someone who's conviction is strong, i decided to 'play' along so i replied okay and he told me e songs this morning.

for a person who lives by conviction, its easy for me to sometimes follow blindly and be taken advantage of. simply because commitment is conviction. what is conviction? that means something u strongly live by if not to u, its considered sin.

i dont mind being commited. even to the extent i fall into depression. i dont mind being committed to the extent i get crushed and brokened. why? because its conviction. i dun really care anymore. i just wanna please God, even at e extent of man. thats conviction too.

u may think im a very light, bubbly happy person who lives a very relaxed life. i tell u know, no. my convictions are strong and only God can move them. thats why i get pissed when people miss service and cg. ohhhh birthday..ohhhh i got cough..ohhhhh i got flu..ohhhh ohhhh ohhhh

whole day ohhhh-ing. be careful u dont ohhhhh to much until flies fly into your mouth to make a nest! and i dont like associating with people who take God for granted..who take God lightly, because ive been through that experience in my life and i can sort of relate to how God feels.

its like dumping Him on a date in front of His face. how disrecpectful and inconsiderate can you get? i told myself, as long as i have 2 legs and breath in me, i will be there. i dont care if im there to live or die, im there for God.

im sorry but if ure someone who take things lightly then im afraid, we may be friends but its hard to be close to me. as long as i dont feel God when im with you, sorry. i wanna go where God goes, i wanna be where He is, i wanna do what He does.

for 4 years ive not missed a single service/cg. im not trying to boast. im trying to tell u that it CAN be done. its only whether you WANT to or not. How much do you love Him?

The proof of your desire is in your pursuit.

i dont neglect my family. i just arrange for plan Bs so that my weekends are not disrupted. there are people who watch things happen, there are people who make things happen, and there are people who wondered what happened. which one are you?

its one thing to see God move. its another thing to make a move of God.

this entry is not directed at anyone. i dont flame people in my blog. i just blog my thoughts and feelings, and some generalization. thats all. if u feel ure 'spoken' to then its not me. im just here..a normal guy, doing IT, playing my granado espada and going to church, serving, etc.

just now while i was preparing for cg, i was tearing. i was asking God, if my fingers could be longer. i cant pluck barred chords without touching the redundant strings! its not a laughing matter, im serious. i almost gave up guitar because of that.

i dont think u can find another guitarist whose hands are smaller than mine. you know a standard sized logitech mouse? my palm cant even cover it from one end to another, even though my hand is stretched! thats how small my hand is!

i dunno..i tink im gonna screw up on one of the songs. i was so depressed i couldnt pluck that one song properly. i was angry with myself for awhile..then i just broke down..realising that without God, im finished. thats how dependent on God i am. i told Him, God, if ure not gonna help me, then no matter how hard i tried i wont be able to pluck that song.

sometimes its amazing to wonder and ask God..why me? im just an ordinary student who sucks at programming, who feels lonely and emo at times, someone who's quiet and reserved. someone whose hands is smaller than a logitech mouse.

and im officially broke. yes..literally. one thing that im glad for though, is that this sunday im doing webcast again :D ha.

ECommerce and Sociology

well, what do u know. my ECAD assignment has officially started and today marked e most shocking moment of my life..to realise that "he is a she". lol..wanna know more ask me personally. something to do with my project haha.

anyway, tests coming, assignments started. kinda busy, worn out and tired. most of all..bored to death. thank God for the good weather today.

right now its 445am..yep. im doing helping a friend of mine with some online sociology quiz lol. when i first saw e questions i almost fainted. and so..being a man of my word, i helped out, and even though i was gonna faint, brainburst, emo-mode, etc..i did all the way till the very last question.

and when ure tired, the flesh becomes strong.

basically, on my browser i had 10 tabs opened, one to search for each sociology term. its an MCQ and each option was a bombastic word..lol. and every sentence i read, i have to go online to do a study and a definition check. its more like im learning sociology. no textbook, no references, no resources..i just trusted God to lead me to the right, reliable websites.

and i spent like an hr just to study 3 person's theory of sociology and philosophy, and study the respective definitions..lol. thank God the gospel is simple! ive seen pages with paragraphs after paragraphs of WORDS lol. each sentence had one word that i needed to check e online dictionary for.

and i know NUTS abt socio lol..i didnt even know a guy called Max Weber existed O_O err..whoever that is..^.O Doing socio is like asking me to do interpretation of tongues without the help of God ._.

and of all times, my internet have to be disrupted at this hour O_O dots! oh ya, speaking abt e lengthy, wordy paragraphs..you guys seriously need to take BASIC IT courses. First, ALWAYS use Sans Serif fonts, if u dont know whats that, check up the internet. secondly, your page shldnt be more than 50% text..(or at least i remember it to be around there), etc and so on...

oh wells..gotta sleep soon..need to prepare for cg later..and oh, im gonna change e color theme again. this color theme sucks i feel..lol. and i cut my hair this afternoon, goodbye hamster and goodbye color..lol m_m

oh yes, ive jus received the results of that murderous quiz. there's 20 qns and i got only 6 wrongs. not bad for a "never-even-say-the-word-sociology-before" IT student, who's dozing off and probably 'sleep-typing' just now..o.o

Run

Came back from run. So sad, i thought it was gonna rain, cus the breeze was good and the clouds were hovering :S boohoohoo T_T

actually i thought i wouldnt be running tonight. cus i was supposed to run at 10pm. and so happened, just nice at 10pm, my dad had to come home with supper and wanted us to eat because it couldnt be kept overnight O_O. thank God it was something light.

so i merely delayed my run till about 1130-1145pm.

just now when i was bathing, i got testimony. God saved me from death and concussion LOL. well, when i bathe, i dont grab the shower and bathe, i stick it onto the shower hook, or whatever u call it..and its suspended quite high LOL. not that im tall, im just short ^.O anyway, so i was washing my hair and my head was bent down and i was scrubbing my hair and all..

and u can imagine..my hand, scrubbing my head, while facing down. and what do u do normally when u rinsed/washed finish? u lift up ur head and u fling ur hands over your head, across your hair to drain water out, right? or mebbe from your face, whichever way u wanna put it.

and so while i was moving my hands upwards across my face, just so happened the moment my hand was directly above my head..the shower dropped! and yes, it landed on my hand!!! which didnt hurt at all..but the shock hurt even more LOL. just imagine if my hand wasnt there, man, i could have woke up tomorrow thinking im Ms Lee or something O_O

ok, u might think im already insane and all..i have one word for you:

Waaaadeva..LOL.

anyway..ive decided. since everyone' has watched transformers..ill just do what im gd at..DOWNLOADING! muahaha! yea..sad right? everyone's getting transformed and here i am getting deformed (from the stupid heat!) o_O anyway, speaking of transformed and deformed, i was thinking of typing:

People transformed!

Im deformed!

Conformed to my uniform!

YAY! *Waves pom-poms! Go go hamster! Go go banana! Go go peach! Go go strawberry!

An An Drew Drew all the way! WOOH!

o.o

If I had a webcam now..

ookay, so its really getting to me.

haha i think im really losing myself..on e other hand..how could i lose myself if i nv even found myself? haha. guess im becoming more gay. yep..im gay that im gay. you are gay, i am gay, we one one big gay family :p im feeling gay too. im so gay that im gay. arent you gay that im feeling im gay that im gay? hahaha..

okay, i better stop here..lol..