Typical Singaporeans Rant.

Typical singaporeans are facey people.
They care a lot about their face.
Not just physically, but also emotionally.
They are always overwhelmed by generation gaps.

Typical singaporeans have a big ego.
They walk around with their heads lifted high...
So high that they cant see the lamp post in front of them. *BANG.
Sorry to say this, but especially aunties...
Or even 'youth aunties', they love to put their bags on one chair and sit on the other.

For what reason? I dont know, maybe they wanna show off their bag?
Or showing off their feministic dominance?
You dont see guys doing that do you?
Well, maybe its because we dont carry handbags.
Except for tinky winky..which Im not so sure, if he's a guy in the first place.

Whenever I see ladies doing that..I love to give up my seat.
It becomes SOOOO easy. Just to suan that lady in front of everyone.
I love doing that.

A friend once told me,
In the eyes of a lady, she's always fat.
Maybe you should stop taking up 2 seats just for one tiny butt of yours.
You think this is cartoon network???

A typical singaporean loves to hog the escalator.
Okay, so you wanna stand next to your girlfriend, fine.
But come on, if you both stand to one side, and you behind your girlfriend...
You can still hug her from behind right?

Sometimes you should really use your brain to think..
Ah! That shows one thing, you arent really a creative boyfriend after all!
You could also use your God-given eyes, to really start looking around you.

In front of you, is NOBODY at all.
Behind you, is one whole pasah malam gang of people all stuck because of you two.
Then again, you think this is America's Funniest Home videos ah?
Well, let me tell you something. This isnt america, and this isnt your home.
So behave properly, in public!

Typical singaporeans love to enter a lift, stand there like a museum artifact, and wait for the door to close.

Why doesnt anyone press the buttons huh?
You want me sign you up for usher isit?
If you wanna enter a lift to stand there at the back.
Go take the stairs of the escalator.
You can stand anywhere you want, you can even sit down and let people trample on you.

Typical singaporeans walk really slow!
Im fine with slow walkers, but please dont HOG THE WALKWAY!
If you are...*cough...not so fast. Please stand one side.
This is not your grandfather's road..
Okay, this is a walkway, not a road..but still..

Fine, assuming its YOUR grandfather's road.
Well, Ive got news for you. YOUR GRANDFATHER ISNT THERE!
Ohhhh wow, how come I didnt know?
Cus you're blind you dimwit!

You think your father pay tax I scared ah?
Well..let me tell you something.
My Father gave your father a job okay!
Ohhhhhhhhh...wooooooowwwww...thats so corny...
Im so a-maize-d.

Sorry my lameness and crappiness. The heat's getting to me.
I shall end with one video:

Hotness Prevails - Worst Video Ever.

If you think that is me, I feel sorry for you.