Obedience is greater than sacrifice

I felt horrible.
I felt pain.

Emotions were running inside of me.

The wound is still healing.

No matter how much my flesh said no,
No matter how much my heart aches,
No matter how much my thoughts ran wild,

I forced myself to go for prayer meeting.
And I broke through, even though its a little, but at least there still is.

I didnt care how people think.
You think it was easy to be there? No.
Every single second, my heart aches.

Does it take guts to face people you've let down? Yes.
Does it take guts to face people who've let you down? Yes.
Does it take guts to put aside everything and focus? Yes.

Was it emotionally draining? Yes.

But I guess thats how I am, stubbornly stubborn.
Stubborn to people.
Stubborn to God.

So stubborn to God's love, that it forces me to do the ridiculous and the embarrasing.

Its not about the pain, or the sacrifice.
Its about the obedience.

I know the feeling is weird, tense, you name it.
But I still went.

How strong is your will?
How strong is your spirit?
How deep is your love?

If I can do it, so can you.

Sometimes you need to stress yourself,
Pressure yourself, force yourself.
Be fearless, be 'ruthless' when it comes to God.

Back in JW days, even if no one went for extra service, I still went alone.
Even when no one went for PM (there was once), I still went, prayed with strangers,
Met new people.

Its not JUST about the people.
Why are you in church?

If one day, bibles are banned.
If one day, churches are banned.
What will you do?
Where will you go?

Can you still love God?
Can you still encounter Him, hear from Him?

I know I can.
Because I still feel Him, even in dry or painful moments.

Its not just about DOING THE THINGS,
Its about KNOWING the person.

Its not about going to church,
Its about meeting God.

Its not about praying to Him,
Its about having communion with Him.

Its not about fasting,
Its about seeking His face.

Its not about singing songs,
Its about expressing your love.

Its not about lifting your hands,
Its about surrendering a 100%.

Are you someone stuck to religion?
Or are you someone with a genuine relationship?

If you're not willing to do the ridiculous,
You'll never experience the miraculous.