The Lonely Road

For a start,

Ive not been 'really' blogging haha. Most of the time Im just posting notes, but for a change, Im gonna post what I really feel, the things that go on in my life, etc. So...cut me some slack okay? hahaha. :P

I know there will be those who will comment and msg me and tell me, 'ohhh andrew, u shouldnt be so negative, blahblahblah', hey! Am i your friend or not? Yes, having 'disciplers' are good. Yet sometimes, I need FRIENDS too right? People who are willing to listen, to sympathize, to just...share my life together and walk this road together with me, isnt that what friends are supposed to do? Stick through thick and thin? Haha.

I get the feeling some people just want me for my revelations. Haha! OOPS! Did I hit a nail? LOL. Nah, it doesnt matter to me haha, its your life and I dont wanna be too much of a busybody. God rewards, not me. Besides, its not just 'my' revelation, but its God's.

Anyway, back to the point, haha...

One thing Ive learnt from Evangeline, as well as from the life of some pastors, that a successful leader, tends to walk alone for a long time, sometimes even YEARS, walking alone, for some reason. Maybe its because of the price they were willing to pay.

And its those years spent alone, when God draws so close to them. With literally no one around them, and no one to rely on, these great men and women of God learned to lean on God. And its those tough times that makes a cheerful person.

You know, I have quite a number of non christian friends and they live really happy lives. I have a friend, who had a treat to a meal her 21st birthday, thats all! And that alone has made her feel she has the whole world! I mean, honestly, I was blown away. That the little things in life, really mean alot to some people who have learnt to be grateful.

Yes, people dont always have what we have, they may not be that 'sophisticated', yet they learn to treasure the simple things in life. Sometimes we want so many things, yet when we do get them, are we really happy? Most of the time, the things we want are merely things to cover up certain hurts or emptiness.

Sometimes, you gotta learn from the non christians, really. Im not sharing some theology, its truth man! lol. If you wanna learn to be happy, learn from those who ARE happy! DUH! Of course dont learn the wrong things, have some COMMON SENSE.

I was watching a TV show last night, showing some really inspirational stories of people with handicaps going through life like a champion and I began to relate so well with it. That you will never be a cheerful and grateful person, if you always have everything. True?

You will never understand the true value of friendship, until the day it has been taken away from you, and so on...same with other aspects. Thank God for a great familly, and a few close friends, these are the simple things in life we should never take granted for.

Did I choose to live a lonely life, withdrawn from people? Of course not. No one would even desire something like that unless he/she is, well...not right? haha. But someone how God has led me to this life, that somehow, I dunno why, I find people withdrawing, not me. Well, I do sometimes, but I dont know, haha. It just feels this way. My love tank isnt getting any deposits.

I mean, thank God for people to L4D with, to watch movies with, to even have a simple meal with haha. I really treasure everyone. Thank you, thank you :) But if there arent any, well, life still goes on right? I mean, I cant force people to do things and Ill never will. I dont think God forces either. ;)

There are even times He would 'allow' a mistake...those we consciously make when we choose to insist on our own ways, He'll just say, "if you really want it, you can have it". At the end of the day, we just end up learning the hard and painful way...the chastening of the Lord..haha.

Of course, if you're smart, you'll be teachable and proactive to avoid the 'caning' of the Lord. If you're always getting 'caned' in order to learn your lessons, then something is not right. You've not grown to that stage of 'spiritual adulthood' or rather, another term would be, 'spiritual MATURITY' yet. :O

In life, what you want, you seldom GET. It is only GIVEN to you.
By God, according to His discretion.

I know God is doing a work in me. What work? I dont know. But I know its great enough for Him to put me through such great fire like these.

The most precious diamonds are often placed in the hottest furnaces.

Some people cant imagine what its like growing up with no friends in school, before 13 rather. They just cant imagine what it would be like. Well, what is your capacity? If you dont have the capacity to go through something, or if you dont want and are afraid to go through such things, then God wont force it upon you.

I posted a revelation on FB a few hours ago...that...

The greatest victory in life is total surrender to the Right Person.
All of us want life to be easier.
But how many actually come to a point where God fights for you instead?

The key..? One word:

Relationship.